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Rules of a happy marriage

I know i sometimes post about marriage/relationship thingy, i hope you're not bored. i just feel that these infor are really good for sharing!
1. Never go to bed angry
I once received a booklet from a wedding studio during a bridal fair, and inside there are tips of a happy marriage. i remember this tip so vividly! i think this is very important. before i got married and while i was study at KL, we sometimes argued and hung up the phone just like that, without thinking about the consequences. to me, it was like, 'so what? now that we argue, but i know we'll be fine tomorrow when he calls me.' but the thing is, if one of us did not take the 1st step to make things alright, the problem will only grow deeper though we still speak to each other. it will be just a temporary solution.

2. Always be 100% honest
To me, honesty is the most important ingredient in a relationship/marriage. sometimes honesty may hurts, but come to think about it, is it better to know the truth from your partner rather than knowing it from someone else's mouth?

3. Never vacation without each other
The received wisdom here is that if you have time off from your jobs and lives, you should naturally prefer to spend it together. But one problem with this rule is that you and your spouse may not have the same definition of a great getaway, (you like to ski, he’s a beach bum). So just be sure that you don’t always take off without each other. (most of the times, we go for holiday together)

4. If you fight, you're headed for divorce
Of course some couples fight, but its important to find ways to fight healthily and productively (without blaming, name-calling and the like). constant fighting will not solve any problems.

5. Once you have children, they come first
Making your relationship top priority is better not just for you, but for your children, who need to see you in charge and who feel safer and more secure with parents who have a loving relationship. though i have not have any children yet, i believe they are innocent and should always come first.

6. You should never sleep in separate beds
It’s a myth that couples always sleep better and more cozily together than apart. One partner may be a toss-and-turner, or one may hit the hay early while the other keeps a reading light burning till the wee hours. So if one of you occasionally decamps to the guest room, don’t sweat it. Just be sure a separate-bed habit isn’t about avoiding intimacy.

7. Partners should sync up their hobbies
Pursue your separate interests and find activities you both enjoy. erm, ok, my hubby likes PS3, so perhaps its time for me to learn to enjoy using the joystick too =_=

8. If there’s no spark, you’re doomed
Many married couples understand intellectually that they won’t always experience that I’ve-been-drugged-by-love feeling in a long-term relationship. But many still believe that when the spark dies out, it means they’re in the wrong relationship, and seek something new. Long-term relationships survive on commitment and trust, out of which grows love.

9. Boring is bad
A drama-filled relationship may feel exciting, but in the long run it’s not likely to be healthy. anyway love expert believes that it's ok to occasionally have a safe, relaxed, ‘boring’ life together in the everyday because you can always inject excitement with vacations and activities.


  1. good tips for marriage but i don't agree that children come first in marriage.. husband or wife should come first.. my marriage counselor always tell me and my partner. if we are not fond and secure with each other, the marriage will not work..if marriage not work, den is difficult for the children. just my 2 cents of what i learnt from my marriage counseling

  2. Lin Da, of course both the partners must have proper planning before the birth of the child...
    anyway, all the best to you! ^^

  3. thanks for the sharing~
    wish everyone will get their happiness~ Kampateh!!!

  4. Evelyn, welcome!
    eh when you plan to get marry ha? :P

  5. Hmm, I personally think it's okay to go to bed angry sometimes. Because when we are angry, we tend to say something unpleasant to the ears. Hence it's better to keep our mouth and sleep, let the mind cools down and settle the problem next day.

    Thanks for sharing :)

  6. Hahahaha... I laughed so loud when you say perhaps it's time to learn enjoy using the joystick!
    I thank you for your sharing too! I'm very new in this kinda thing, I mean relationship, not marriage lar. :p

  7. Yvonne, well, you have a point there.
    i think this is very much depends on individual. we just have to make sure this doesnt happen always...

  8. Shirlexia, lol, yes la, i need to show interest in his hobby and he needs to do the same too, like, shopping for perfume with me. haha *grin*

  9. SOMETIMES baby comes before we plan....

  10. Linda, haha, i forgot to mention, MBA (marriage by accident) is excluded in my previous comment :P

  11. Really good tips and absolutely right. When having children, they come first, and must also remember not to neglect our partner.

  12. Hi Hayley, ha ha, love this posting.
    Like thesaying, 'first the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then the suffering', ha ha.
    By the way, thats a beautiful picture of you in your profile.
    Have a nice day, Lee.

  13. Angeline, most of the points are so true right?

    Yan, yes, we should always care about each other and work together to strike for happiness ^^

    Lee, thank you! lol the saying is true, i hope i dont have to go through the last stage :P

  14. LOL... we are now sleeping separately, and thanks to our chirpy Juan Juan who likes to wake his brother up during bed time!:p

  15. Alice, well sleeping separately in your case doesnt means anything negative, right? :P


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Aden: 各位阿姨叔叔好啊!=)

最近实在忙,几乎一个星期才能生一篇文,有时两个星期呢 =_="
早上都在忙家务忙孩子和载大宝上学。  下午得哄小宝睡午觉~ 还要兼顾我的网卖生意。 不过最近的他好像不爱睡午觉了耶!如果他没睡我就更不得空了!得陪他玩~  话说玩不到一下下就得出门载Aden回家了~~ 每个星期的两个傍晚我都会上tabata课,一下课就回家继续当‘佣人’ xD
晚上就是陪/教Aden做功课,有时间的话就看看AOD的香港连续剧(话说最近的连续剧都不好看!)  过后就要给孩子们睡觉啦!  每天大概就是这样过,几乎都在做同样的事,都是围绕着家庭和孩子。  不过忙归忙,累归累,我觉得都是值得的啦!  当了全职妈妈5年,没后悔过 ^^

 近两个星期的天气都很糟~ 想不到可以去哪个游泳池(之前去到酒店游泳池已经不开放给外人了 T_T),所以干脆在家玩玩水就好~ 还好这几天开始有下雨了,要不然真的要发热气了!

 上周末大宝的幼儿园老师举办动物园半日游,我第一时间报名 :p (当然是先问Aden意愿啦) 虽然上学半年多了,很多时候他还是比较内向/慢热。这次就让他和老师朋友出外郊游。原本想和他一起去,还好我没有!想说借这机会让他独立独立 =)

 老师拍的照片~  看了都感觉很热很热对吧?  一说到动物园,我第一形象就是热!xD

 去载他的时候都没什么,老师也没有complain xD  问他开心吗,他说开心,看到很多动物,还说谁谁谁跌倒,谁谁谁的妈妈有去等等~  看来是很enjoy啦!

 我虽然很累很想休息,不过周末傍晚如果天气好,我都会尽量带他们出外玩玩~  要不然呆在家也是看ipad玩玩具而已~

 久久晒一下夫妻两的照片 :p  我们还是一样,无穿无烂 :p 只是最近的他晒黑了很多!没办法啦!太阳公公太热情了,而老公也得出外做工养活啊~ (
辛苦你了老公) 话说我好像很少在这里提起我家abang的ho?哈哈!
不知不觉都认识了14年,当夫妻已有8年。  两公婆开心的时候有,不开心的时候也不少呵呵~  不过这也算正常吧?毕竟要两个不同背景的人要走在一起组织一个家庭不容易,难免会有意见不合争吵什么的~  我觉得最重要还是要互相体谅和多沟通啦!这样才能长久~ right? =)

 从早忙到晚的我,真的很需要好好保养和调理身体~  感恩我遇见…