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How I feel being a mum for two boys

Busy. Tired. Confused.

Big brother Aden is turning 4 years old this coming May.

Many commented he looks quite big for his age. Yea, he is kinda tall compared to other kids at the same age. I guess he probably inherits his daddy's genes in terms of height ;)

Sometimes being a mother makes me kinda dilemma... I want him to expose to outside world, try all sorts of food, but at the same time, I am worry about him becoming chubby/fall sick easily =_=

Aden is unlike other kids, I just can feel it when I see my friends' kids. He is those super stubborn and naughty type. The more you ask him don't do, the more he'll do. He just won't listen. Seriously he is testing my patience every single day!

 People around me sayang him and hardly beat him. But for me and hubby, we just cannot control it. I am not a patient type of person (even with 2 kids). After once or twice of warning and if he is still behaving bad, I will beat (Then feeling guilty afterwards :p)

People say he will behave better as he grows up and after he goes to school. I hope so. 
Things will be so much better and easier if he can helps look after his little brother for me.

Speaking of little brother, he will be ONE next month! :o

As for Toby, I actually don't control him too much compared to Aden at the same age.
I let him experienced different food, even adult food (just a little bit of course). I let him crawl on the carpet/in the bathroom, play with electrical sockets. (Of course with supervision la)

He is one glutton boy, and I mean it. Whenever he sees us eating, he starts making noise and requesting for it. When he can't get enough, he bangs his hands on the table, or simply, shout. 

He masters the art of drinking from straw within minutes. May be that's the power of breast milk? xD
I feel that he is smarter than his kor kor~ 
By the way, I am still breastfeeding Toby. And I am in dilemma whether to wean him off when he turns one. Actually my initial plan is to breastfeed him til 6 months old but don't know why the plan fails :p

Breastfeeding offers a lot of benefits, I do love the bonding with him, and it is so much easier. But at the same time, it's more tiring, physically and mentally. It does has its inconvenience too. Like, I cannot go out without him for more than 4 hours (I don't pump anymore since fullmoon).

The reason I thought of weaning him off is that he now eats a variety of food already. And who knows I might go on trips with hubby this year? :p
But really no idea how to do it...

Breastfeed baby tends to be very clingy to mummy and it's very true

He wants just me. Cannot let him see me, else he will sure want to me carry. I think I have to wear a mask from now on :p

I admit I feel loved and proud knowing that both kids are clingy to me. But at the same time, it's super tiring. Imagine both want your attention all the time. You really cannot go pangsai unless there's someone who helps you look after them.

I realize I long for a break even more frequent. Even just an hour of ME time is like a heaven to me.

Moreover, Toby is at the stage of climbing high and low now. Really must pay attention to him all the time.

Sometimes I feel bored doing the same things everyday. BUT I won't want anything else to replace it. Parenthood is hard. But it's rewarding at the same time. As long as both of them grow up healthily and happily, I have nothing else to ask for ;)


  1. My opinion is kids growing up really fast, please enjoy them now. You will regret for not spending enough time with them. So, what you have done now is right.

  2. I heard my auntie mention my cousin son, teeth growing, he bite the mummy when the mummy breastfeed him...

  3. Mei, those are the feelings and experience from parenthood that no one else knows about it. Just do whatever you feel it right for the kids, Mei.

    Eventually, there are growing up pretty fast too. Now I kinda miss my Calvin when he was still a baby. For Hebe guess same attitude like Aden. This girl also very stubborn and lots of "siu jie" attitude.

    Mei Jia You!

  4. Be patient, it's like that.. People around you (even my mum), will say all sorts of things, don't beat, don't scold, poor thing him, etc.. They only see him/play with him for a few hours, of course ppl will say like that.. But you+hubby are the one taking care of him and facing him 24 hours a day, so it's different.. So yes, be patient.. I also cane, but feel guilty later.. Sometimes no guilty, haha..

  5. Your younger son's forehead is so nice shape and big. He is very intelligent and will do well in his studies.

    Now Aden reminds me of my cousin who was so naughty when he was young until his mum had to find a medium to ask the Ang Kong. She wanted to know what kinda punishment she had for having a notorious son? The Ang Kong told her it's her karma and that he would change dramatically at teen age. I used to fight with him with punches and kicks until blue black. When he reached 15 years old, he really changed 100% and sent me a CNY card to apologize his years of rebels. We became closer when we studied in colleges and traveled together.

    So be patient mummy!!

  6. I guess being patient is also a key to parenthood, or maybe put on the shoes of the kids and think from their perspective.. I guess sometimes we just need to think out of the box and instantly we see lights.. anyway, think about having two healthy children who grow up happily, and I guess that's the ultimate happiness for a mother.. the results beat the processes, haha!! :)

  7. OMG! Toby's pictures make me smile big big! He is soooo cute! Aden is looking more grown up now and still as leng chai as ever. I understand it is a big challenge and responsibility as a parent. You love them and at the same time you have to be tough with them at times to discipline them. I respect you Hayley!

  8. Not easy being a mom, it is like 24/7, maybe you can try "reverse psychology" on Aden, last time I got one student, the more you ask him not to do something, the more he purposely do it.

  9. The photo where Toby is climbing the stairs and Aden is climbing the bannister nearly gave me a shock as I didn't expect Aden to be hanging on to the railings so high up. You are a good mother to both your sons.

  10. I can imagine it is a tuff job.


  11. You are so blessed. I only have one girl and at times, it gets a little lonely...and boring too, I guess, hanging around with the old parents all the time.

    Yes, I used to beat too - must discipline...but of course, beat within limits, to teach, not to hurt.

  12. I can be quite harsh also towards my girls but as they getting bigger, I have tonned down a bit and I hardly use my cane. If I have to use, I will inform them in advance what makes me need to use the magic stick.Haha

    I know motherhood journey has never been easy but at the end of the day, you do gain a lot from it.

  13. Kids growing fast and we get older fast too.. time flies..

  14. U r great mum.
    Is not easy become 24 hours mother and breastfed.
    I can crazy if I fulltime!
    Look both brothers....they r so cute and chubby...this show u pay 101% attention to them

  15. 全职妈妈不简单,工作不开心还可以辞职,全职妈妈这份工作却是当一辈子!加油~你已经很棒了!

  16. No worries, Hayley, you are doing fine! Just look at your two chubby sons, I know you are doing a good job.. as for naughty, which boys are not naughty at this age.. hahaha... Girls too are the same!

  17. The boys grow up so fast!! Very nice photos of them.

    Aden would be fine once he is in school.

  18. so nice seeing those kids' pictures...both of them are still cute & chubby. I feel like wanting to cubit their face.

  19. Aden真的看起来比同龄大一些,我也猜想遗传了他爹地的高度。男孩都比较好动,真的需要更多力气说教哈哈。家有!
    两兄弟都很pong pong哈哈。

  20. I don't think beating is that bad. After all, my generation, we all grow up being beaten at some stage in our lives. Nowadays the kids have had it good and turn out being too pampered.

    But maybe not so frequently, beating has got to be the trump card, the "joker" card, if beating is administered too frequently, will end up like my brother: Ceh, beat only ma, the pain will gone one... :/

  21. Yeah, we men understand it's not easy being a mom, especially full-time, like my wife. At least for us, we can work and come home to play with them.

    Oh.... sometimes the boys can learn a lot of bad things in school, especially primary schools. I suggest you send Aden to school instead of letting him take the school bus.

    Toby is so cute ... enjoy your moments with him. Now, with my slightly grown up kids, I miss their toddler and baby moments.hahahah

  22. definitely not easy to be a full time homemaker, jia you!

  23. Haha! He's so cute when he's eating. I love his chubby cheeks, would like to pinch them. Not hard of course, just like to feel the cheek. I do that to my better half too (not hard of course) but she doesn't like it. I just like the texture of cheek. :p


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